Forum Post: The cycle of poverty and violence
Posted 5 years ago on July 31, 2018, 8:11 p.m. EST by elf3
(4203)
This content is user submitted and not an official statement
Mother unknowingly emotionally abuses daughter, daughter looks to a man for guidance, financial help, and escape (thanks to Disney), moves in with the man, but accidentally picks someone unknowingly equally as disordered as mom not recognizing it as dysfunction and now there is physical abuse, repeats the cycle mom said see it proves you were worthless all along and now you deserve this and get to live how I lived. If she gets pregnant, without insight into the dynamic, she accidentally emotionally abuses daughter not realizing it is abusive and the cycle repeats, she is doomed to repeat it. This can happen to sons as well but more often they try to stop abusive dad from beating mom and end up injured themselves.
So boy gets taken from abusive home, goes into America's foster care system which is rampant with abuse. Boy looks to a group of other boys to escape to and afford to live ( Peter Pan Lost Boys) boy finds a man as equally messed up as dad not recognizing his symptoms as so bad (especially since foster care was even scarier and worse)...the man is in a gang, they teach him how not to take shit, how to make money, and give him the sense of acceptance he was missing. But soon he is in over his head they begin to treat him just like dad did and tell him he must deserve it. Next, he meets a girl she makes him feel good for the first time in a long time. She gets pregnant. But there is lots of stress and now they cant seem to get along. He gets in trouble with the law trying to please his boys and make money to pay back or support them and now his girl. She tells him he is worthless. He teaches his son tough love. He starts to hit her not really recognizing it as abuse. And the cycle repeats all over again.
So when will America incorporate these lessons into our education system. When will we teach our kids how to recognize love when they live and are raised with something called love but is so very not it? What will we do to heal and teach them the lessons they most need to know about? Love is all you need. But first you need to know what real unconditional love is and feel worthy to receive it.
Love is what we need. And this lesson most urgently needs to be incorporated into our education system before it repeats again.
EDIT
That pretty much says it all - it stares us right in the face ALL AROUND THE WORLD - many will point it out, only to have those in power poo poo the observation and declare that police or other harsher military intervention is required.
EDIT
The government pushes a significant portion of the population into poverty (supporting the wealthy few that own them) - and - wallah = unrest crime violence. You can see it happening here in the USA as the wealthy few manipulating government remove all protections for society in their bid to suck up even more profits......................YES - that is a simplification - but is valid all the same.
I think we also have created a system by which children can only succeed with good parental support OR two incomes which drives young people to rely on a relationship to share the cost of living. The COST of living is way too high. It should not depend on two incomes. People should be able to pay rent alone. Have time to be single and figure out who they are alone. We are not taking into account some kids truly can't and shouldn't rely on or stay within those abusive home environments. Unfortunately many of those homes ruin their own kid's credit, believing it is within their right as a form of financial contribution to the household. This creates a system where those in unhealthy homes, are thrown into an economic system which will not allow them to succeed. A low wage working full time, where financial aid just doesn't cut it, when a working full time income doesn't cut it, no time to attend school, and student loans are impossible.
But...i will add you can provide all the education in the world but bad credit or a criminal record stains every future endeavor. As well as if jobs are shrinking and everyone has a degree, what will it get them? Clearly we need more lucrative ways to support oneself than criminal endeavors. Working at Target and Staples doesn't cut it. Retail unions are critical (and edit): AND...
We need higher taxes on WallStreet so government can provide the jobs Wall Street is not: we need to stop privatizing government work and instead directly pay our citizens to work like we used to instead of letting WS take a cut and buy their yachts and mansions and then to dominate and inflate our housing market and increase rents and cost of living, resources, etc. (NEWSFLASH WS is the one who has been stealing OUR ONCE GOOD PAYING GOVERNMENT JOBS FROM OUR LOWER AND MIDDLE CLASS THRU PRIVATIZATION INSERTING THEMSELVES AS MIDDLEMEN TAKING CUTS (like an aristocratic form of taxes?) FROM OUR WAGES AND BENEFITS !!!)
Not only do we need to teach love and relationship dynamics before it affects their early schooling or future record and keep their credit safe from their dysfunctional parents. We MUST also get rid of our 7 year!!! DEBTOR's PRISON!!!!!...especially if they are under the age of 20. Perhaps a new rating system for those under 30-35? We need an economic system which supports youth to succeed regardless of their lack of family support upon graduation. Not all kids can or should stay at home. Not all kids can rely on their parents. We also need a way for them to come back if they havent done their best or already screwed up. We need a working system with pay and hours which enable education. We need to get rid of superfluous classes and prerequisites. Education must be streamlined. Costs must be affordable. Full time working people need to be able to attend. We need jobs when they graduate.
Edit:It should be MANDATED by law that BANKS SPONSOR and PAY for financial education in our schools BEFORE kids reach an age to receive credit. Banks should be held responsible for issuing credit to anyone under the age of 18...putting children in the predicament of financial abuse...banks have become abuse enablers. If it occurs the CHILD or then young adult who finds out...should be directly issued a $20,000 payment from the issuing bank as well as have the record expunged through a simple process. We all should have open unlimited access to our credit reports as well as an easy way to correct id theft which should not fall on victims to prove their own innocence. The issuing banks need to be held liable. As well as banks are issuing credit to thieves in children's names and it should fall on the issuing bank to prevent this most egregious form of id theft. Our youth have enough on their plates to deal with as they enter into our unfriendly unwelcoming bankster economy.
And the social security office now hides/ no longer mails our income reports forcing working people to spend a day or two waiting in line each year accessing it, seeing if it is correct and making it hard to figure out if we have suffered financial abuse in our name or if income is being properly reported. If you have had id theft you are forced to shut off online access.
I haven't read the WHOLE thing yet - but I very much agree - that we need a NATIONAL Minimum "LIVING WAGE" (one that allows a single individual the ability to work as little as 40 hrs/wk and pay for ALL living expenses as well as have money they can put into a regular savings account), the living on CREDIT system is INSANE and we need to get back to a CASH & CARRY system (actually pay CASH for all purchases other than say for a house or a car) and get rid of ALL usurious credit purchase systems.
(more probably later)
Love is the only way out of this mess we find ourselves in both personally and globally.
When love is absent cruelty and abuse happens. We see this in personal relationships, as you discuss above, and we see it in relationships between the powerful (governments, corporations, the wealthy) and the masses.
It may seem like a platitude and it may seem silly to some, but love really is the answer.
This cycle can repeat in all classes, (minus gangs and the same level of poverty), but abuse can also exist in a gilded cage. As well as abusive parents tend not to support their children after they leave home, or pull away support as a form of control thus leaving them in a condition which can also lead to poverty or running into the arms of the same accidental and doomed relationship dynamics.